We envision what we want our tomorrow to look like. We have an idea of what will bring us to the next step in our personal master plan. For a number of us our track record doesn’t seem to be stellar when we look at the number times we have failed to execute or complete our intended plan. Whether it be picking up a new skill like playing an instrument or learning to cook. Getting in shape, or positioning yourself for that next career step, the newly intended habit doesn’t seem to stick.
We don’t set out to fail but do more times than we would like. So what is it that holds us back?
One way we can dissect this roadblock is by looking at what it takes to create a new habit. At end of the day, every new venture requires us to create a new habit.
Here are 3 considerations when you are planning for a new habit
Factor #1:
In order to create that new habit, you need to have space to accommodate it. If you just bought a new couch, then either you have an empty spot for it or you need to move the old one out to accommodate the new one.
Factor #2:
So if the space doesn’t exist it’s very easy to lose sight of the new. So in some cases we need to break or discard old habits that are no longer serving us. Is your habit binge watching your favorite streaming service 3-4 hours a night? Is that habit serving you in a positive way? Perhaps, breaking that habit will free up sufficient time for you to explore and or establish a new one.
Factor #3
Now I’m not saying you have to cut the old habit cold turkey. Perhaps you start by reducing the binge to 2 hours a night, giving you 1-2 hours of opportunity to start your new habit. Then it becomes a 1 hour binge a night and 3 on your new opportunity. And perhaps that’s the limit you need to establish to be content.
Great! We’ve figured out the formula right? Not quite. Establishing space for the habit is only the first part of the equation. Often times we get as far as this but still fall short. One of the main reasons for this fumble is because we don’t immediately see the results that we had envisioned. Picking up a new habit, developing a new skill isn’t always easy. There’s a learning curve that we need to overcome that we don’t always account for or prepare for.
We fall prey to old sayings
If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again is a mantra many of us have grown up with. And then we prescribe to the definition of insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
So how do not give up without turning to insanity? While some believe the answer is to stop trying altogether, there is a better approach that will transform that insanity into perseverance.
A small tweak may be all that is necessary. Let me explain with an example.
If a dish turns out to be a disaster because it’s too salty, you wouldn’t replicate that dish with the same amount of salt. That would be insane. You would try again and in your next attempt tweak or adjust the amount of salt. A small adjustment can result in success. A little less salt, a little more of another ingredient to balance out the salt. An adjustment here or there may be all you need. Or perhaps upon further examination it’s the sequence in steps in the recipe that needs to be adjusted. Or the inclusion of a new step that requires you to add a little salt and taste before continuing.
The point is there’s always an opportunity to adjust and try again. Perseverance increases the likelihood of success as long as we understand the adjustments being made.
To help drive that perseverance we should consider 3 factors:
Factor #4:
Have you accounted for failure as part of your plan? By setting the expectation that the first or subsequent attempts may not be successful, it won’t be a shock or disappointment if the desired results were not achieved. It can quickly deflate our enthusiasm and drive when we’re not prepared for it. Having this mindset sets you up for the next factor of consideration.
Factor #5:
Have you conducted a postmortem analysis? When an attempt has been unsuccessful, are you conducting an analysis of what potentially may be the cause? This analysis serves to provide you with the opportunity to adjust with an intelligent reason. The taste was of, what about the taste? It was too salty. Then on the next attempt I need to reduce the amount of salt.
If we define failure as not seeing the results we intended. Then the analysis will position you to ask yourself an opportunity to make rational adjustments. Did you provide enough time to see the results or was your time frame perhaps unrealistic.
Factor #6:
Have you identified your cheering squad? Those who will help you ensure your plan is sound, will encourage you and push you to persevere when you find that you are doubting yourself. It is not easy to go it alone. The degree to which you need that support will differ from person to person and opportunity to opportunity. Yes this is something you want to accomplish yourself. Having a cheering section doesn’t mean that you are giving up control.
You intend to lose weight so you start a new workout plan. You thought you would see results in a week. At day 7 you weigh yourself and the scale as barely moved. For some the reaction is to give up. If we factored into our plan that we would like to see a loss of 5 pounds in 7 days, but also factor into that plan that you might not reach that target….
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Have you allowed for enough time to allow for results.
Watching a clock
Is your time frame for change realistic
Sounds great in theory doesn’t it. It’s actually a very practical approach, that’s easy to grasp and apply no matter that the opportunity. This is the approach we utilize with each of our clients at Lyfe Support. If you would like to gain more insight in how to apply any one of or all of these three factors, connect with me at Lyfe Support and let’s set you up for success.
In conclusion “New Year’s resolutions are like gym memberships: We all sign up with the best intentions, but most of us end up canceling our plans before February.”
